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2007-02-12, 9:31 AM

那就通通毀了它吧

在寫有關美學的文章,美學,是深刻生活的體驗,是深厚文化的積累.

寫到半夜一直卡住,覺得一定哪裡出了問題.突然想起跟表妹的MSN對話.

今年在我們家吃完年夜飯後,他們初一就要全家去花蓮.我不禁開始想,那我跟老媽要去哪裡玩好呢?我不想讓她過一個孤單的新年.於是,我又想起往年,我們也是兩個人,怎麼不孤單?於是,我想起去年被拆掉的老家...

我們眷村,老是老的點,家裡還會漏雨喔,可是走出去就是如親人般,從小看著我們長大的鄰居.老媽,甚至一些更老的,獨居的爺爺奶奶從來都不寂寞,因為我們有很美好的故鄉啊,有那麼多那麼多親人.

然後因為眷村改建,什麼都拆光光了,可笑的是,大違章的市場卻因為攤販的抗議,到現在都沒有拆掉.所有的人四散了.我們從新竹搬到桃園,有的爺爺奶奶花了一輩子積蓄加上政府的補助,買了所謂的國宅,哼,偷工減料,牆壁用掃把一敲就破了,中庭的磚塊用腳踩一踩就撬起來了.你們是在耍寶嗎!!!!每次我看到這則新聞就氣得跳腳.無恥沒有良心.

當然,眷村改建是長久的計畫,我只能認了.反正這個島上現在也都不認為,我以前來自的村落有正當性,我們最好都隱默在人群中,不要被看見也不要有聲音,講了,人家也不聽,說我們不愛台灣.反正村子舊了就該拆,不用像日本的全能住宅王一樣,花更少的錢留下更多記憶.不用,我們本來就是漂浮的.

************************

但這些情緒都被正名給引爆了.我以前是個小台獨,明明在眷村長大喔.可是,此番的正名卻讓我非常地不齒,要知道,我歷史系念得不好,但我知道歷史不是今天誰執政就把舊的東西改一改拆一拆就沒事了,你有發展出深刻的論述嗎?你知道什麼是歷史的痕跡嗎?

好啦,就算我都不懂,你們最懂好了.正名了,就獨立了嗎?

我一直在納悶,如果我支持台獨,那麼,我看到正名運動不是應該感到高興嗎?但我只感到羞恥,正名不是風光快樂的,而是因為執政太失敗,搞些別的名目來掩人耳目罷了嘛.證明了什麼?

******************

這跟美學有沒有關係?有啊.沒有包容,怎麼能夠深刻?台灣之豐富美麗,在於它有太多的歷史糾結跟傷害,以及勇敢地復原.黃薇說啦,"只要能引起撼動的都是美,無論快樂或是憂傷."你只要表層的東西,又怎麼能說台灣要有深刻文化,你只要你認定的那一個文化嘛.搞什麼嘛.稿子怎麼寫下去都是很荒謬的啊.

拆啊,去把所有東西拆光光,都改掉.把人們的記憶都抹光,最好把台灣改得跟記憶裡完全不一樣,這樣我們就算跑去對岸混口飯吃,或者攢錢移民,都不用感到失落了.反正已經沒有故鄉了.

[自言自語]

引用

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陳 凱爾 於 <原來是台灣來的呀> 引用本文
文摘: 要過年了,我在等垃圾車,除夕的最後一趟垃圾車, 所以閒著的空檔晃了一下眾友的BLOG, 在小貓那裡看到一句「原來是眷村來的呀」, 感覺,一句看似平常的話,怎麼暗藏很複雜的心結。 那我也想來說說我知道的眷村。 (首先我是不是要先交代的是「什麼人」?) 我是本省人,在台北出生,父親討了二房生意失敗避居台中故鄉, 所以我跟著媽媽在台北繼續生活。 (然後好像要交代我的語言專長?) 小時候不會說台語,所以也沒有特別意識自己是「什麼人」, 我想,這跟說什麼語也一點關係都沒有吧。 小時候住景美,印象中仙岩路一帶有...
引用時間: 2007.02.17

歷史上的今天


迴響

這些東西都是為了拍馬屁搞出來的
誰管小老百姓的美好憂傷回憶啊
想到我家鄉的田被高鐵徵收就火大
醜得要死的怪物就這樣立在原本是田的地方
田沒了樹沒了
爺爺們泡茶聊天下棋的土地公廟也不見了
奶奶去年對我說
你放心,我還活著一天,我就不會讓老家消失的
奶奶走了,我不知道自己小時候的記憶能不能繼續保存
那是僅剩我可以追尋最久遠前的處所了

由 hussard 發表於 February 13, 2007 1:27 AM

支持小貓

由 貓兒 發表於 February 13, 2007 11:43 AM

非常沈痛的一篇好文。
只可惜基本教義派已經「破壞上癮」了。

anarch 發表於 February 14, 2007 3:55 PM

記住
陳水扁跟民進黨他們是真的假台獨
這樣就可以解讀正名運動了

由 pastz 發表於 February 14, 2007 4:39 PM

對於民進黨政府種種作為,我也覺得十分心痛。
我雖從小就不住在眷村,但我爸爸很多朋友都是
住在眷村。現在民進黨政府沒錢,就以改建為名,
就把眷村徵收賣給財團蓋豪宅炒地皮。而讓那些
眷村的老人拿著少少的補助款去租或買十分差的
房子。看那些老人在人生最後的時光,是在外面
孤獨的活著,我覺得很想哭。

由 Aaron 發表於 February 14, 2007 4:51 PM

如果去過榮總
就更能深刻感到他們的悲哀
前半生在兵荒馬亂中度過
到老來
能有老伴攙扶著上醫院就算幸運的了
沒錢沒勢
連國家也不養你

楊傳廣晚年的蕭瑟
有人管過嗎
在靈前上柱香又如何
這樣的政府
讓人心寒

由 天空藍 發表於 February 14, 2007 5:32 PM

奧斯丁倫尼寫了一本相當有名的政治學教科書,他在其中討論民主的定義有四,其中之一就是大眾諮商。確實,一個實施民主制度的政府,在處理可能引發爭議、衝突而損害公共利益之重要議題時,往往會透過各種管道與大眾諮商,而不是逕為決定與實施,否則就不免落入民主的反面:獨裁。

政小四 發表於 February 15, 2007 1:09 AM

原來是眷村來的呀

由 etlove 發表於 February 16, 2007 2:58 AM

我是不贊成統一
但名盡黨這樣搞
除了加速統一進程之外
不會有別的

由 pingtp 發表於 February 19, 2007 11:05 AM

Gee whiz, and I thhgout this would be hard to find out.

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People normally pay me for this and you are giving it away!

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